Evil Dead 2013

Just saw this a few nights ago with a buddy of mine. We're fans of the original two films. I'll keep this brief. I'll start with my buddy's summary: he said he'll do horrible things so he can go to hell and torture Rami for eternity for letting this film be made. He didn't like it.

We peppered the movie with a lot of "I'm your brother", "Where's my needle?" and "Momma's gonna bye you a mocking bird." We had to entertain ourselves with comments, ala MST2K style, because the film dialogue and logic was lacking. Classic case was Eric, the educated guy with glasses, is studying the book, after serious, deadly, mysterious things are occurring to these kids, and he declares to the others, something like, "I think this book raises demons." To which the Olivia, the brown actress, responds, "Shut up, Eric!". That pretty much sums up the film for me. Any hint of something smart, interesting, logical, funny or good, and the film instead goes dumb, numb or boring -- 'cool teen dumb'. I thought it failed at building characters, developing the story, building suspense and mood, music, logic, humor, etc. It was so painfully less at everything that the original two were.

Wreck-It Ralph (2012)

http://i346.photobucket.com/albums/p...psa9730c47.jpg

>>: B+

Now You See Me (2013)

http://i346.photobucket.com/albums/p...ps57d90f86.jpg

>>: B+

Hatchet III (2013)

http://i346.photobucket.com/albums/p...ps87352807.jpg

>>: B-

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/...aL._SY300_.jpg

A scattered family comes together for the wedding of the adopted son. And once one skeleton rolls out of the closet, plenty more start rolling out, showing how dysfunctional and funny behind-the-scenes stuff can be.

All-star cast, but despite so many familiar faces and some genuinely laugh-out loud moments, the film missed substance. Too many things started to happen too quickly. The only character you could care about was Katherine Heigl's, and it was a shame, really.

Could have been much better.


* * ½




http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/...6L._SX215_.jpg

First things first, Mark Harmon looks uncannily similar to Tom Cruise. So much so, it makes me wonder if the role wasn't written for Cruise first, and the makers had to search for a hurried replacement for him. A quick look at IMDB confirms part of it - although the actor Harmon replaced was originally Don Johnson. Bad choice, because Harmon looks completely out of place in his character and fumbles through the film.

Connery puts in a restrained performance, except for a bar scene when he takes on a guy 3 times his side with his "right thumb", so to speak. It could have been intense, but it became funny instead. Meg Ryan tries her bit to make things exciting during her on-screen moments, but they are few.

The plot starts off interestingly enough as a crime/investigation caper, but tapers off into unwanted drama, shoddily-developed second half screenplay, and a completely dissatisfying ending.

The only reason for watching this would be Meg Ryan. It's 1988, and she's simply drop-dead gorgeous (this being one of her early films).

http://i.imgur.com/ScOqfhf.jpg


* * ½

"Gallowwalkers" (2013)
-Wesley Snipes

Plot: Rotten Tomatoes

A cursed gunman (Snipes) whose victims come back from the dead recruits a young warrior to help in the fight against a gang of zombies.

Phantom's Review: As I've stated in older posts, I love westerns, their my other favorite genre after horror , so when these two genres meet, I always hope that we're finally going to get a film that shows the best of these two type of films. Sadly, "Gallowwalkers" dosn't even come close, to showing the best of anything.
To be fair, the film is shot nicely and the director tries to capture a spaghetti western look, which he does OK. and their are a couple of truly beautiful women in tight corsets that look nice, and Wesley Snipes makes for a charismatic western hero, but that's about it.
The plot is virtually non existent, the acting is below average, the action minimal, and the scares are none.
A major disappointment.
Hopefully one day someone will make a good "Weird" western with the right amount of action and thrills, but that's not now.

Oldboy (original)
 

Finally watched the original Oldboy ahead of the upcoming remake. I was expecting a good movie and I was still blown away by it. Great performances and a plot that keeps you guessing until the end. I even appreciate that the last shot lets you decide what the fate of the main character. I highly recommend if you haven't seen it yet and don't mind subtitles.

The Hobbit

It was ok. I actually fell asleep at one point. LOL

:D That good huh?

LOL, I think part of my problem with it is that the book was never my favorite. I always preferred The Lord of the Rings. And the other part of my problem was I was really tired. :D

The Last Exorcism Part II (2013)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ps39275f51.jpg

I honestly have no idea why I thought this would be worth watching. I'm a bit embarrassed that I even gave it a try... Then again, I'm amused by the title - I mean, how can there be a Part II if it's the LAST exorcism, AMIRITE?


...


Kiss of the Damned (2012)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...pse721eacf.jpg

Pretty. Stylized. And how 'bout that cool retro poster?? What I liked about this movie is that it was a good homage to 70's vampire flicks - Erotic, sensual - I found the concept to be interesting and different than the slasher/zombie fare that has been thrown at us lately. If you're a fan of the genre, I say definitely see it. There was a lot I liked about it, but also a lot that I didn't (Milo Ventimiglia, who plays our male lead is honestly terrible, to be honest), and in the end I was a bit disappointed. That being said, if you like stylized, slow-burning 70's horror, you'll dig this.

...

Argo (2012)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ps2dc4b279.jpg

Absolutely fascinating and gripping true story. Ok movie. I was actually more interested in the pieces that I heard on NPR about the tale than I was in the movie itself.

...

Dead Before Dawn (2012)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ps7409d878.jpg

Mostly unsuccessful horror comedy. Watch Shaun of the Dead instead.

...

Side Effects (2013)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...psb041d0d8.jpg

Heard really good things about this and I was honestly captivated until the "twist"... Not really sure that it needed to be that complicated, and I'm not convinced that it worked. Also, what I found troubling...

[SPOILERS]

As someone who suffers from depression and bi-polar, I honestly connected with this movie immediately and loved that we were actually given what I thought was a convincing and horrifying look at depression... Buuuuuuuuut then of course Emily kills her husband... So what's the message, that medication is bad?? siiiiiiiiiiiigh - Honestly, I'm lucky enough to find medication that works for me... AND I know that there are a LOT of people who are against these types of meds... BUT I hate the message that THESE TYPES OF MEDS ARE BAD because, honestly, while they might not be for everyone, they have seriously turned my life around....... So, there was THAT... But THEN it turns out that Emily was FAKING?! SERIOUSLY?! So all of the first 1/3 of the movie where I thought, "Wow! I think it's important that we're seeing depression in screen," WAS JUST A LIE?! So, what - Message #2 is that people who are depressed are actually faking it?!?!"

I know I'm exaggerating but those two themes really hit me; I found them ignorant and just for the purpose of a relatively ridiculous "thriller."

[/SPOILERS]

Argo fuck yourself..

Kenneth Anger's Inauguration of the Pleasure Dome:)

Best part of the movie. :p

Pretty much the only thing i can remember. :D

I watched House of 1,000 Corpses on Friday night with a big group of friends. That movie is always really fun to watch in a group, especially when you're all fans of it and you all end up quoting the film the entire way though.

___________

"Enjoy that dead girl's body."

That's my favorite Rob Zombie movie. It's been a while; I need to rewatch it.


...


The Place Beyond the Pines (2012)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ps1bc4c338.jpg

Interesting enough character piece though I feel as though I should have liked it more than I did, considering that the cast was brilliant and I really like that director... Could have been the mood that I was in but I found it a little drab. Oddly enough, I loved Blue Valentine - Could be that I just identified with the characters more there than I did in Pines - It gets a lot of good press and I get why, but was just flat for me.

...

Spring Breakers (2012)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...pse94764ca.jpg

I was really impressed by this - Definitely captures the disturbing vision of bourgeois ennui that sets off a series of violent events - Paralled to the glut of Spring Break - I found it disturbing and fascinating. Not for everyone, but I loved this movie and really want to see it again.

...

You're Next (2011)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ps450e137d.jpg

Really good, solid horror. Great writing - Funny dialogue and gags that were well-timed and played, this movie is not just another home invasion flick. A lot of fun to watch. I want to see it again because I sat next to people who talked through the whole time... Which is unfortunately why I don't go to the movies very much anymore.

Recommended.

...

The World's End (2013)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ps66496ca3.jpg

Absolute and total blast. I love these guys. Wanted to rewatch it immediately (and am considering cutting out of work to go see it again now... hmmmm....). Recommended.

...

Stoker (2013)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ps27daf66b.jpg

Subtle, slow-burning creepy brilliance. One of the best films of 2013. HIGHLY recommended.

Vacancy 2 -

I knew the first one wasn't that good. But it had Kate Beckinsale. This one has Agnes Bruckner so I decided to give it a watch. She's been in a few horror movies. I thought the opening twist was pretty good. But then it goes downhill for some of the most boring dialog I've heard in a while. Maybe the actors were just too generic. Or maybe they were supposed to be that way. Whatever the case, it's here that once again we see why prequel or origin stories in horror movies don't work. After the boring stuff it's by the numbers modern horror complete with the annoying character. Usually a Black or Asian guy. This time it's a Black guy. But the annoying Asian was in the opening so they didn't miss that cliche anyway. I guess because Agnes Bruckner was in horror movies before she gets the strongest role. So if you want to see this for her. I guess it's somewhat passable. If not then avoid this one. It even has one of the worst final shots I've ever seen in a movie. A crappy spinning shot.

State of Emergency (2011)

http://i346.photobucket.com/albums/p...ps3864380d.jpg

>>: C+

V/H/S/2 (2013)

http://i346.photobucket.com/albums/p...psc31befde.jpg

As an anthology for found-footage genre, liked its predecessor, thought it was quite decent also. Enjoyed mostly the frame story (Tape 49) & the Asian segment Safe Haven.

>>: B+

Safe Haven was fantastic! The movie overall was just OK, but worth it just to see that clip. I need to watch the director's other films - Have you seen any of them?

"Footsteps" sounds good. The rest of his movies are martial arts flicks.

Shrooms a.k.a. A Group of Idiots go to the Woods in a Foreign Country to take Hallucinogens and play Ten Little Indians -


The idea alone of going into the woods to take mushrooms is pretty stupid to me. I always thought mushrooms were poisonous after seeing them in my yard when I was young. I still avoid them. Forget about eating them. Besides my mind can go to wild places without drugs. Check out my dream posts. Even alcohol isn't the best for me. As I don't like to depress things.

It's obvious who the killer is if you ignore the red herring. Why? Because this is a horror movie complete with a Jason type campfire story. And we've seen this "twist" before in another horror movie. You would think after that one that no one would try it again. It didn't work in that one and it doesn't work in this one either.

The best part is a scene when a guy meets a talking cow in the woods. Other than that it's a pass.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/...4L._SY300_.jpg

RZ's Spider Baby, effort-wise. Dull and slow to begin with, interspersed with some nice, atmospheric, reminiscent of old-school horror sequences which brighten up the proceedings occasionally.

Problem with the film is that RZ has tried to take things a bit too seriously and has tried to make it all seem like a surreal nightmare. The film's plot could have benefited more from his HO1C/TDR approach, making it more of a grindhouse homage than an actual atmospheric trip interspersed with confusing, surreal scapes.

Screenplay is the culprit here, but RZ doesn't help any with his lackadaisical approach to things. So many talented actors of the genre, but most of them wasted, except for Dee Wallace and Meg Foster who try to make things a bit more enlivening.

Watch if you are an ardent RZ fan.

P.S. - About time he stopped using his wife in his films. She tries her best, but can't avoid looking tired.

* * ½

Safe Haven directed by Gareth Evans & Timo Tjahjanto. I've seen only The Raid: Redeption (Martial art action flick) by Gareth Evans and Macabre aka Darah aka Rumah Dara by Timo Tjahjanto which is a TCM like gruesome horror flick from Indonesia about a crazy family run by a weird-evil lady called Dara, found it nothing special.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/...qL._SX215_.jpg

Found some answers.

Found some more questions.


* * * ½

Riddick

I wasn't expecting much, especially since I love the universe created in the last couple flicks and heard they weren't really expanding on it much here. They didn't. I still liked it. Big budget, B-movie, monster madness right here.

Based on Peter Straub's novel, it tells the story of Julia Lofting (fittingly played by Mia 'Rosemary' Farrow), who's fleeing an unhappy marriage shortly after the death of her only daughter and moves to a new home where becomes haunted by the ghost of a vengeful little girl. Though it sounds & started like just another well made 70s typical atmospheric horror film with a very few ghostly encounters but this dialog driven, pretty slow burn horror flick offers a pretty intelligent ghost story that requires your full attention. At times, some may find the plot bit confusing as there were too much information about some important off-screen/past characters & events, and then there you'd have the suspicions & questions about whether it was all in Julia's psychologically twisted mind or there's actually a ghost but again...is it the ghost of Julia's dead daughter or an evil little girl killed by her mother who used to live there before or may be that poor little boy who died at a nearby park by some evil-twisted kids long ago??? The thing that remarkably completes this whole puzzle was its great-spooky ending; I'd say the ending also made it quite different than other films with seemingly similar premise and just lift it almost to the same level with 70s unique classics like Don't Look Now or even Let's Scare Jessica to Death!

>>: A-


It's surely an awesome watch for Chan-wook Park's excellent cinematography with such great use of light, shadows & colors that made this thriller brilliantly atmospheric & engaging that would made Sir A. Hitchcock proud 'without a doubt'....but that's my friend I like to note here as a drawback for a film made by the director of such outstanding films like Oldboy & Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance! Though, as a new screenwriter, the Prison-Break actor Wentworth Miller done a very promising job & I'd love to hear he gets busy with more scripts in coming days but as a story I found the Stoker is nothing but a modern & slightly twisted update of Hitchcock's Shadow of a Doubt which stylishly made by Mr. Park and that's the little disappointment for me; as a fan of his earlier films, I expect more twisted & thought-provoking challenging stories in Park's film that would made our viewing experience something very special or unforgettable like the way he did in his Vengeance trilogy. But again, Stoker is obviously a quite satisfying experience for thriller lovers where the little cast convincingly shines through their roles, particularly Matthew Goode once again proves his talent (after the Watchmen) that he can be a significant choice for the filmmakers next time to play any psychologically twisted or intelligent bad guy role.

Overall, Stoker is marvelous in visuals & character developments but plot wise it's just an old wine in a new bottle, which isn't a little bit of a bad thing at all unless it's made by a highly talented director like Chan-wook Park.

>>: B+

Last Seen Movie
 

V/H/S

I don't know, I must really dig horror compilation type films because I enjoyed this one. Some of the segments were disjointed, there was some bad acting, and it was pretty silly as whole but I still found myself liking it.

INSIDIOUS

An excellent, if flawed film. The first 3/4 I thought was near perfect. The mother and father were real, sympathetic characters played well by both actors. I found the actor playing the father in particular giving a nuanced performance with more depth than the usual "doubting father" role. The increasing visitations were truly frightening. I found some of the comic relief off-putting, and the gadgetry silly. The last act kind of ran out of steam for me. The dream world was not very scary and the big battle was anti-climactic. I know they were gearing up for the final twist, but the payoff would have been more meaningful if the father's battle for his son had been more harrowing. I give it 8 out of 10.

The Croods

Watched this with my kids. They loved it. I thought it was cute and entertaining.

"Three inches" 5/10


Never seen a super-hero movie with this little action.

The story sounded fun. It wasn't.



"Boot Camp" 5/10

Good story badly executed.

Curse of Chucky.
Hm, pretty whatever.
Doll now looks strange.
Lacking in Charles dialogue.

Insidious -

This is the real deal. Very welcoming compared to all the torture porn stuff that's coming out these days. It's almost perfect. My only slight problem were a few comic relief characters. But then a serious character shows up. I watched this movie during the daytime and it gave me chills a few times. Very similar to when I was young watching the original Nightmare on Elm Street. And even close to when I think I encountered ghosts in real life. I really want to see Part 2 now. But I hesitate to see horror movies in theaters these days. I really like the experience which can be easily ruined by a bad audience.

I enjoyed Insidious a lot, but I think I enjoyed The Conjuring more. I felt the two separate stories tied nicely together, the scares were mostly natural in their implementation (not just loud sounds and jump cuts) and the characters were easy to identify with and sympathize for. The acting was excellent and the cinematography and editing drew you in more than pulled you out of the story.

WORLD GONE WILD

Super low budget post-apocalyptic world where it hasn't rained in 50 years. Bruce Dern stars as the sort of guru/leader of a settlement called Lost Wells, which has a source for water. A violent dictatorial cult wants the water and Dern must rally a motley crew of mercinaries to protect his town. Cast includes Michael Pare and Adam Ant. According to IMDB the original script stated the cult was based on one of the worlds few remaining books- Dianetics. The L. Ron Hubbard Foundation found out while the film was still in production and threatened to sue, so all references to Dianetics were removed. Still a fun, cheesey little scifi action film from the 80s.

Satan's Little Helper and The Theatre Bizarre. I liked SLH more but they were both essentially what I was looking for today which was a couple horror flicks I hadn't watched that were decent. Theatre was uninspired and disjointed while SLH was a bit drawn out and some parts just didn't seem to fit in. All in all, not a terrible couple of Monday morning flicks.

Completely 100% agree with you. I loved the first 'Insidious', but something about the atmosphere and editing in 'The Conjuring' made it that much better. I genuinely felt like I cared about the characters (something too many horror movies fail to achieve), and I totally agree about the scares.

My biggest problem with 'Insidious 2' was that there were way too many "scares" that were just loud noises. 'Insidious' had these too, but to a much lesser extent. At times, there was nothing particularly scary happening on screen, but just loud noises that seemed to exist purely to assault the senses. Don't get me wrong, parts of 'Insidious 2' were terrifying (something about James Wan + old women ghosts + closets = holy s***, and the dice were a nice touch), but by about halfway through the movie, I just wanted it to end. The soundtrack just got way too loud and unpleasant.

'The Conjuring' wasn't like that at all. The scares in it were extremely well thought out and executed, and at no time did I feel like the soundtrack was being overused. The movie didn't need a loud soundtrack because the stuff happening on screen was legitimately terrifying and didn't need to be elevated by anything. Even though I felt scared throughout the entire movie, I remember not wanting it to end because it was just so well done and so engrossing.

"Am I still dead" -- The Monkey's Paw -- http://monkeyspawthemovie.com/

*giggles* "Super-hero" movie, huh? o.O

Aren't the majority of horror films getting cinema releases in the spooky house/posessed house or person genre.

Ie The PA series/Insidious/Mama/Woman in Black/Last Exorcist/Sinister etc etc. I can't remember the last film that you might refer to as 'Torture Porn' released here.

Captifs (2010) aka Caged.

French flick about Serbians kidnapping foreign aid workers and harvesting their organs.

Pretty bland stuff lacking even the visual enjoyment that I associate with continental cinema. The usual lack of suspense, of character/relationship development that's the hallmark of so much torture porn, but even as a fan of the genre I found this a rather naff film.

Piranhaconda (2012)

Brilliant. I don't get why people lay into these films for being childish, badly acted and scripted, and with crappy fx. It's like you're missing the point somewhere along the line.

Yea, it's about a dude who saves the world with his 3 inches penis. What?